TheKey Chronicle

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Sunday, September 19, 1999


Our WHOLE society is ass-backwards.

So I go out for this new job, right?

I sell myself as enthusiastic, quick-learning, a multi-tasker and in general, an all-around good guy to have in the workplace. The only problem is, I seem to have done a much better job at selling myself than I thought. Now, I am a little more than a month into my new job and my new boss is wondering if I'm cut out for the job as I still haven't learned everything and am still behind on a few things.

Actually, I think it's not me or my selling of myself, but in fact is this wonderful language we all forget from time to time that we are using. My new boss failed to explain to me the definitions for certain words she was using. Certain words like "overtime" and "expectations" and "questions" were definite problem sources for me over the past few weeks. Obviously, her definition of "overtime" included a much larger number of minutes than mine.

Her idea of "expectations" also failed to exclude a large amount of vertical space. And the "questions" she said I shouldn't be afraid to ask? Let's just say I have questions about her open-ness to questions.

I'm a hard worker - I'm also a college graduate and my boss doesn't understand that people have different definitions for common concepts. What can I do about it? Nothing. I was hoping this job would be a good one for me - it still may be, but I doubt it. All thanks to that wonderful language called English.

I say we nuke the UK - they created this damn language!! Let's make 'em pay!!

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